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[Tsuri and Rieux] Detective!verse
Since it's been forever since I've been here (and, really, I need something to bring this place back to life), here's all the stories I've written about the current, detective!verse incarnation of my original character Tsuri along with her bff Rieux (who is not mine but who I steal and use more often than his original owner, so I basically have joint custody... I think). My goal in life is to get them together, and I have been striving for that since I started using Tsuri in a roleplay back in... gosh... 2006? Yeah. She's changed a lot since then, but her and Rieux's relationship is still perpetually in limbo, which is how detective!verse was born. THIS TIME THEY ARE SO GETTING TOGETHER.
But enough tldr.
Series: Tsuri and Rieux, detective!verse (yes, this 'verse doesn't even have a legitimate name yet)
Characters: Tsuri, Rieux, Saber (2nd story), Mei (3rd story)
Pairings: Rieux/Saber (2nd story), Mei/Tsuri (3rd story), and Rieux/Tsuri (2nd and 3rd story??)
Notes: The first two stories are most assuredly canon. The third one... not so much. Mei and Tsuri's relationship isn't intended to progress as far as it did in that one, and, if you'll notice, the 5th part of that story does not match the events of the second story (even though its supposed to be the same situation). The timeline is also messed up in that one. Rieux and Tsuri definitely met before Tsuri was sixteen. The ending, too, is not really canon, and it really was just an excuse for me to progress Tsuri and Rieux's relationship to the point where they would kiss each other. (And apparently they'll do so only at the end of the world... ahaha... /sigh ;;)
-
Adventure START!
Even at the best of times, Tsuri is not known for her subtlety. And, at the worst of times, she can be a downright bulldozer.
Actually, thinking about it now, Rieux decides that Tsuri is always a bulldozer, just tearing through life with hardly a thought. It's probably both her biggest vice and her greatest virtue, depending on the circumstances.
Rieux decides that, right now, it is her biggest vice. Though he is a marginally more accomodating morning-person than Tsuri is herself, he, like most other sane people out there, does not particularly wish to be awakened at only four hours after midnight.
"I have a great idea, Rieux!" she exclaims, after she has shaken him thoroughly awake.
"Really? How does it rank in comparison to the peanut-butter-and-pancakes idea or the feed-chipmunks-cardboard idea?" Tsuri isn't know for her "great ideas", and Rieux is too sleep-deprived to humor her.
"It's 148% better than both of them!"
"I was being sarcastic." And what the hell is with that random statistic?
"Yeah, yeah," she says, waving off his comment with careless ease, too excited to care. "So, anyway, back to my great idea!"
Rieux groans but doesn't argue further, knowing that nothing he says can really deter her once she has decided something.
She holds the silence for a moment--as a way for the excitement to build, Rieux surmises--before bursting out.
"Let's form an investigations agency!"
Speechless, Rieux merely stares at her for a moment or ten, mouth hanging open in obvious disbelief. The idea is one hundred--no, two hundred--times more stupid than he had thought it would be.
"So? What d'you think?"
"No."
"Wha--"
"No."
"But--"
"No."
And, before she can get another word in edgewise, Rieux continues with, "Just, no, okay, Tsuri? There's so many unbelievable things that could go wrong with this, and they all will because they always go wrong. So, just... no." A sigh. "Now, I'm going to go back to sleep and you're going to leave and we're not going to talk about this in the morning, okay?"
And, that was that.
...Or not.
Tsuri, before Rieux could react, grabs him by his shirt collar and drags him out of the bed. "No, it's not okay!" she answers, annoyed. "This is the best idea since... since sliced bread and you're just going to say no to it?! No, no, no. I'm not going to take no for an answer and that's final!"
A thousand arguments run through Rieux's head, but he discards all of them. None of them would work with Tsuri; once she has decided, nothing can make her back down.
Like a tornado or a hurricane or a forest fire.
Like a bulldozer.
He sighs. There is no other way.
"Fine."
--
Spring Day
It is a clear, sunny, spring day when he meets her again.
Tsuri, sometime in the middle of the night--or maybe early morning (who knows when she sleeps?)--had gotten the brilliant idea of going shopping for some detective gear. Now that they had solved their first few cases, she had said, it was time for them to become official detectives, and official detectives had cool hats and magnifying glasses and mustaches, and are you paying attention Rieux because this is important!
He had thought it was a completely ridiculous idea of course. He thought most of Tsuri's ideas were ridiculous, poorly thought out, even downright stupid at times. But, he didn't voice these thoughts. He had learned quite early on that arguing with Tsuri was like arguing with a rigid, unyielding tree--chances are, it wouldn't listen to you, and, on bad days, it could even drop pine cones on your head.
So, as always, Rieux, albeit reluctantly, goes along with Tsuri's whims.
In retrospect--because hindsight is 20/20, as they say--he is irrevocably grateful to Tsuri for having such whims in the first place. (It was just yet another thing Tsuri did right without even knowing that she did.)
It is at the sixth (or was it seventh?) hat store that Rieux sees her, standing on the other side of the crosswalk, unobtrusive, innocuous, barely even looking his way.
But it is her. Rieux had no doubt.
So, when Tsuri accosts the shopkeeper, jabbering on about detectives and mustaches, Rieux leaves the store and crosses the street.
She smiles when she sees him coming her way, as calm and radiant as he remembered.
An infinite amount of words flood his mind, and, just as quickly, those words disappear, so that all he is left with is a whispered, barely audible, "Saber." Her name. It has been so long since he said it that the taste of it on his tongue stings--of unbridled happiness and of nostalgic sorrow.
"Rieux," she answers, her lips curved into a smile, her eyes reflecting mirth and happiness, love and understanding.
I missed you, he wants to say, but can't. Why did you leave? Where were you when I needed you? I needed you. I still need you. Come back. Come home. I loved--love--you.
He cannot say any of those things. It is too much, too soon, too quickly. But, Saber understands; she always does--did--after all. (It is yet another thing they do not have in common. Saber and Tsuri, that is.)
"Let's go to the park, Rieux," she says, with an undisguised joy that lights up her face with happiness.
This, he thinks, as he allows her to lead, this is a thing they have in common.
-
Saber sits on the swings, and Rieux stands beside her.
They do not speak.
In this moment, at this time, they do not need to speak.
The silence speaks for them, weaving truths and promises, for there is an understanding, deep and profound, between them.
It is a promise of eternity, and the understanding that this eternity shall never come to pass.
"I'm sorry," Rieux says, finally, breaking the magic, ending the moment. (But, then again, hadn't the moment been over a long time ago?)
Saber turns to look at him. Her eyes are curious, questioning. "For what?" she asks, as if she truly does not know.
For leaving you behind, for moving on--for everything, he thinks, but says, "For not being able to save you."
Her hand reaches out to touch his own. "It's not your fault for letting go, Rieux," she says, quietly, as if she could read the meaning behind his words, "There's nothing to forgive."
Rieux looks at her, really looks at her, and sees the girl she was, five years ago. He is older now, and she is still exactly the same.
He wants to cry.
But, instead, he moves his hands over to grasp hers, intertwining, and she smiles and closes her eyes, sighing contently as she leans on him for support.
They stay like that, in that warm cocoon of warmth and love, until Tsuri finally finds them.
-
In true Tsuri fashion, she bursts in with shouts and benedictions, rudely interrupting any form of peace and calm that might have been present.
Saber and Rieux quickly extricate their hands as Tsuri starts on her tirade.
"Rieux, I've been looking for you forever! At least tell me if you're going to run off on me! Anyway, can you believe it, the day's already almost over and I can't find a single suitable detective's hat! What kind of businesses are these people running anyway?! How can they expect me to work without a hat! Don't they know that true detectives--"
It is only at this point that Tsuri stops, realizing that Rieux is not the only one there. "Oh, hi," she says, unabashed, "I'm Tsuri."
"I'm Saber," the other replies, eyes full of laughter, "I'm an old friend of Rieux."
"Wow, really?" Tsuri exclaims, as if she couldn't believe it. "I didn't know he had such a beautiful female friend," with absolute sincerity.
And, Rieux briefly wonders how exactly it is that Tsuri is able to sound so charming in front of females but downright insulting in front of him.
With a speed that almost gives Rieux whiplash, Tsuri and Saber are laughing and giggling away as if they had been friends for centuries. In another moment, Tsuri excitedly extracts a promise to eat ice cream together and hurriedly, in typical Tsuri fashion, runs off to buy some, all without even considering Rieux for one iota of a second.
"She's nice," Saber says, her wide smile the product of the whirlwind that had just passed through, "I like her."
"Good," he mutters, and, sardonically, "She'll probably marry you if you asked her."
She turns to look at him again, her smile lessening but never disappearing altogether. "She's good for you. You look happy."
"Don't," he says, pleads, because the words are beginning to sound like a farewell.
"You know I have to go, Rieux. You know I can't stay."
He shakes his head.
She stands up and puts her hands on his. "You've grown up," she whispers, looking at his face, "I'm happy for you."
Don't leave me, he wants to say but doesn't.
She smiles her usual smile, because she had heard it, regardless. "I won't. I'm not. I'll always be here if you need me."
Rieux wants to protest, wants to cry and scream and demand that she stay. But, he doesn't. It's the least he can do now, not making things difficult for Saber, for himself.
Instead, he simply states, "I won't forget you."
And, with a beautiful, painful laugh, she says, "Well, I'll see you later then, okay, Rieux?" and with a final squeeze of the hand, she is gone.
-
Bearing ice cream, Tsuri comes back thoroughly confused.
"Where's Saber?" she demands, as if Rieux had somehow magicked the other girl away somewhere.
"Dead," Rieux answers, curt.
Tsuri stops, midway through her ice cream, and shouts an exclamation.
Sighing, he clarifies, "I mean, she's been dead. For a long time now."
After a bit of a coughing fit in which Tsuri desperately tries to get the vanilla out of her nose, she regains enough composure to piece things together. "Then," a cough, "then that means the Saber that was here just now was a..."
"A ghost," Rieux finishes for her, seeing as she was otherwise incapacitated by periodic wheezes.
"Why-- why didn't you tell me?! Now what am I going to do with this ice cream?!" she yells, gesturing wildly with the cone of her first ice cream to the second ice cream she holds in the other hand.
Rieux raises an eyebrow. "Eat it?"
Tsuri calms down. "Oh. Good idea."
-
It isn't until Tsuri had finished off both ice cream cones and then washed her face of leftover vanilla that Rieux decided to do something he had been considering for a long time but had never done because it is, well, simply put, a stupid thing to do.
But, talking to Saber again had reminded him of those feelings, and all the times he had been overcome with regret because it was too little, too late.
So, for once, Rieux decides to be a little less sensible, a little more stupid.
They are on one of the piers overlooking the ocean. Rieux is leaning against the railings, looking out at the blue expanse of the sea, while Tsuri is completely draped over the metal bars, eyes downcast, sighing over the loss of yet another beautiful female from her list of friends.
It isn't a comfortable silence, per se, not like the one between him and Saber. It is more of a self-absorbed silence, with each too caught up in his or her own thoughts to even consider talking. But, regardless, it is familiar, and, perhaps, in that way, it is even comfortable, maybe.
"Hey," Rieux says, breaking the silence. He doesn't even wait for Tsuri to completely lift her head before, "I love you."
"Huh?"
"Don't misunderstand, Tsuri. I don't love you as a friend. I love you as more than a friend."
Tsuri is fully conscious now, staring at him, shock written all over her face, completely and utterly speechless. (It is, Rieux thinks, sardonically, the quietest he has ever seen her.)
Rieux takes this precise moment to kiss her.
It is chaste, more of a brushing of lips than a true kiss, but, Rieux decides, it is suitable enough to get his point across.
Afterwards, Tsuri makes a noise that would have sounded like "What" if fifty other words hadn't also been thrown into a mix.
Rieux tilts his head, more than a little amused but unwilling to show it on his face, and leans back against the railings.
Finally, after several minutes of decidedly awkward silence, Tsuri finally regains the use of her vocal cords. "I don't know what to say!" she exclaims, the words coming out ten times fast.
"You don't have to say anything," he replies, calmly, "I don't need an answer. I just wanted you to know."
"Oh," she says, "oh."
-
The next day, Tsuri arrives at Rieux's apartment at the usual time (which, as always, is much too damn early).
The awkwardness of the previous day had completely disappeared, whether from a restful night's sleep or a dozen cups of caffeine, Rieux does not know, but he finds himself once again grateful to Tsuri for never taking things too deeply to heart.
Everything will continue like always.
And Rieux is completely satisfied with that.
--
Aeterna
*Or: 5 times Tsuri was kissed by someone and 1 time she kissed someone else
1
Tsuri is in fourth grade and impossibly young.
She's best friends with Mei who is really sweet and cute and funny, and they have been friends for a year now (never mind that they met in the middle of third grade) and everything is new and wonderful and interesting.
Half the girls in the class have discovered this secret club that all the adults were in, something having to do with crushes and boyfriends and love. And they all want in too, so they stand around looking at themselves in mirrors (because that's what the adults do) and giggling to each other and pointing out a boy and designating said boy as cute or adorable. (Never handsome, not yet. The word is too incomprehensible, too adult.)
Tsuri really doesn't know what all the fuss is about. They're all just boys, aren't they? She has two younger brothers, and they're two three-year-old terrors, really, and she doubts six more years will change them much.
But, everyone else seems to be so invested in this new game they've found, and Tsuri hates to ruin their fun, especially because all the girls are looking so much happier and cuter for it. She likes seeing the other girls happy, and she doesn't understand why they would want to spend all their time looking at boys when girls are so much nicer and prettier.
But, but, Tsuri humors them and joins in their discussions of who is the cutest and do you think he likes me back. She even participates in their boy-watching activities, pointing out who she thinks is cute (the one on the right, but not as cute as the girl who sits on my left in english) and who she might have a crush on (the one with the brown hair and the freckles, but not as likable as the redhead with pigtails who always sits in the front).
She becomes so invested into these activities that one day she slips up and points out a boy in front of Mei. (And Mei detests these talks. She would always frown and turn away when other girls mentioned it.)
"Really?" Mei says, frowning, "You like him more than me?"
Tsuri blinks at the silliness of the question. "Of course not." How could she possibly like a boy more?
"Oh."
And then Mei is leaning in, and before Tsuri can fully understand what is happening, she feels a featherlight touch on her lips and realizes that Mei had kissed her.
"Oh," Tsuri echoes, "Oh."
-
2
It is the teen years, high school, and Tsuri is fifteen and still young, still impossible.
Mei is still Tsuri's best friend, and they are still the same, still as always.
The school dance is coming up, and Tsuri eagerly requests pictures from all the girls she knows. The guys in their suits, the girls in their dresses. She thinks it's all wonderful really, the amount of work everyone puts into it all to make themselves beautiful (even though, she thinks, privately, even though they're all so beautiful already).
On the night of the dance, Tsuri takes Mei to their secret spot, a hill overlooking the town, and they have their own private party.
They don't wear dresses or jewelry or makeup, and there is no music to accompany them. But, when Mei leans in and presses her mouth firmly against Tsuri's, Tsuri can think of nothing better than what they have, here and now.
They stay like that for several long moments, lips slightly parted, simply breathing into each other.
-
3
Tsuri has just turned sixteen, and she is not so young anymore, not quite.
Rieux is her new friend. He moved into town a few months ago, sad and alone and looking for all the world like he does not have a single friend in the world. So, Tsuri becomes his friend, because she's Tsuri and she's interested in this strange, new boy who looks like he has a gaping hole in his chest where his heart should be.
Mei is still her best friend, but Rieux is now too. Sort of.
And Mei is about to kill Rieux, and Tsuri is, for once in her life, completely at a loss.
"You're choosing him over me?" Mei asks when Tsuri stops her, tears in her eyes, looking betrayed.
No, Tsuri wants to say, no, this isn't so simple as choosing someone over another. Instead, she simply takes away the knife in Mei's hands.
Mei is crying and unstable and Tsuri has no idea what to do. When Mei leaps at her, she drops the knife and almost (but not quite) raises her arms in order to defend herself, but all Mei does is wrap her arms around Tsuri and desperately (so, so desperately) kisses her.
It is a sloppy kiss, tainted by tears and betrayal and an acute fear, and all Tsuri could do in the face of that is to push her gently away.
Then Rieux says, level-headed and practical as ever, "We need to call the police."
Always so pragmatic, Rieux.
-
4
Tsuri is seventeen, and she has decided to become a detective. Together with her trusty partner Rieux, they'll be the next amazing crime-fighting duo that no one can ever stop!
(Rieux keeps on saying that she's getting Sherlock Holmes confused with James Bond, but Tsuri begs to differ. She knows they're different, she just thinks it would be much, much cooler if they were one person.)
And, now that they have officially solved their first case, Tsuri has completely proven Rieux wrong (the downer, always saying that something will go wrong; well nothing went wrong!), and she is anxious to return and gloat right in the other's face.
But then the owner of the stolen jewelry wanted to thank her personally, and Tsuri can't deny a pretty girl anything, so she goes to her estate and knocks on her door and smiles when she's admitted, fully expecting the detour to last only a few minutes.
Well, it isn't the first time Tsuri's been wrong.
The instant Marie sees Tsuri, the former blurts out, Thank you very much, and I really like you, and If possible, could we maybe, possibly go and get coffee sometime, please.
It takes a few moments for Tsuri to decipher the babbling. It takes a few more moments after that for Tsuri to realize that she has just been asked out. By a client--their first client, no less.
(Tsuri sincerely hopes that this type of thing won't become a habit.)
So then Tsuri proceeds to spend the next hour and a half comforting the girl and trying to say, It's not you, it's me, when it actually is her and not Tsuri, and in the end, Tsuri feels so awful about the whole thing that she agrees to a kiss in order to pacify Marie.
The kiss is quick and shy and over in less than a minute, and Marie is so embarrassed about the whole thing that she practically pushes Tsuri out the door.
If she had known this is what would happen, Tsuri would've suggested the kiss from the start.
-
5
Tsuri is eighteen and Rieux has just kissed her on the pier.
Rieux has just kissed her on the pier.
Tsuri frantically tries to rewind the day's events, trying to find something, anything, that has hinted at this inevitability.
No, absolutely nothing.
Of course, Tsuri silently scoffs to herself, of course I can't expect Rieux to be predictable.
There are a number of things Tsuri can say at this point, from What in the almighty name of James Bond and all things Sherlock are you doing? to I can't believe you kissed me right after we just saw the spirit of your dead girlfriend! there really is an endless amount of possibilities. (Inanely, her brain supplies an image of a mustache with the caption: I mustache you a question, but she pushes the thought away. Jokes later, explanations now.)
Finally, Tsuri manages a garbled out response that mostly consists of the word, "What," but is about twenty times too long to be just that one word.
Rieux sighs and then proceeds to explain. Yes, I am completely serious. No, you don't have to say anything. Just listen, Tsuri.
And: I've been in love with you for the past few years.
Tsuri feels like she's about to faint.
-
5 + 1
Tsuri is ageless. She has seen nine, sixteen, twenty, and bypassed them all.
She's standing on the edge of the world with Rieux (always with Rieux), and looking down at the wide expanse of the earth, so far and so beautiful.
"Where do you think we should go from here?" Tsuri asks, and the question comes out as a mere breath, light and soft.
Rieux sighs and turns away. "Wherever. Does it really matter, as long as we're together?"
Tsuri wonders, briefly, how Rieux is able to say all this without seeming embarrassed in the least. It's an idea that has been often considered, however, so Tsuri quickly pushes it away. "So we're staying together?"
Rieux turns back and shoots Tsuri an incredulous look. "Of course we are." The why would you ever think otherwise? goes unspoken, but Tsuri understands--she's had a lifetime to get used to Rieux's particular brand of non-verbal communication, after all.
"Oh," Tsuri says, regardless, and, laughing, "I'm glad."
With a small sigh, Rieux makes to move away, but Tsuri stops him with a hand on his arm.
Rieux raises an eyebrow and tilts his head--the What? is obvious, though unspoken.
"Nothing," she replies, smiling, and then she leans in to kiss him.
It is not a great kiss, as kisses go. Rieux is so surprised that he starts and their teeth clash almost painfully together and, even after adjusting, their lips never quite meet perfectly and neither seems to know whether to keep their mouths open or not.
But, when Tsuri pulls back, flushed and embarrassed, and sees the first signs of color on Rieux's own face, she finds that this moment is perfect, just as it is.
But enough tldr.
Series: Tsuri and Rieux, detective!verse (yes, this 'verse doesn't even have a legitimate name yet)
Characters: Tsuri, Rieux, Saber (2nd story), Mei (3rd story)
Pairings: Rieux/Saber (2nd story), Mei/Tsuri (3rd story), and Rieux/Tsuri (2nd and 3rd story??)
Notes: The first two stories are most assuredly canon. The third one... not so much. Mei and Tsuri's relationship isn't intended to progress as far as it did in that one, and, if you'll notice, the 5th part of that story does not match the events of the second story (even though its supposed to be the same situation). The timeline is also messed up in that one. Rieux and Tsuri definitely met before Tsuri was sixteen. The ending, too, is not really canon, and it really was just an excuse for me to progress Tsuri and Rieux's relationship to the point where they would kiss each other. (And apparently they'll do so only at the end of the world... ahaha... /sigh ;;)
-
Adventure START!
Even at the best of times, Tsuri is not known for her subtlety. And, at the worst of times, she can be a downright bulldozer.
Actually, thinking about it now, Rieux decides that Tsuri is always a bulldozer, just tearing through life with hardly a thought. It's probably both her biggest vice and her greatest virtue, depending on the circumstances.
Rieux decides that, right now, it is her biggest vice. Though he is a marginally more accomodating morning-person than Tsuri is herself, he, like most other sane people out there, does not particularly wish to be awakened at only four hours after midnight.
"I have a great idea, Rieux!" she exclaims, after she has shaken him thoroughly awake.
"Really? How does it rank in comparison to the peanut-butter-and-pancakes idea or the feed-chipmunks-cardboard idea?" Tsuri isn't know for her "great ideas", and Rieux is too sleep-deprived to humor her.
"It's 148% better than both of them!"
"I was being sarcastic." And what the hell is with that random statistic?
"Yeah, yeah," she says, waving off his comment with careless ease, too excited to care. "So, anyway, back to my great idea!"
Rieux groans but doesn't argue further, knowing that nothing he says can really deter her once she has decided something.
She holds the silence for a moment--as a way for the excitement to build, Rieux surmises--before bursting out.
"Let's form an investigations agency!"
Speechless, Rieux merely stares at her for a moment or ten, mouth hanging open in obvious disbelief. The idea is one hundred--no, two hundred--times more stupid than he had thought it would be.
"So? What d'you think?"
"No."
"Wha--"
"No."
"But--"
"No."
And, before she can get another word in edgewise, Rieux continues with, "Just, no, okay, Tsuri? There's so many unbelievable things that could go wrong with this, and they all will because they always go wrong. So, just... no." A sigh. "Now, I'm going to go back to sleep and you're going to leave and we're not going to talk about this in the morning, okay?"
And, that was that.
...Or not.
Tsuri, before Rieux could react, grabs him by his shirt collar and drags him out of the bed. "No, it's not okay!" she answers, annoyed. "This is the best idea since... since sliced bread and you're just going to say no to it?! No, no, no. I'm not going to take no for an answer and that's final!"
A thousand arguments run through Rieux's head, but he discards all of them. None of them would work with Tsuri; once she has decided, nothing can make her back down.
Like a tornado or a hurricane or a forest fire.
Like a bulldozer.
He sighs. There is no other way.
"Fine."
--
Spring Day
It is a clear, sunny, spring day when he meets her again.
Tsuri, sometime in the middle of the night--or maybe early morning (who knows when she sleeps?)--had gotten the brilliant idea of going shopping for some detective gear. Now that they had solved their first few cases, she had said, it was time for them to become official detectives, and official detectives had cool hats and magnifying glasses and mustaches, and are you paying attention Rieux because this is important!
He had thought it was a completely ridiculous idea of course. He thought most of Tsuri's ideas were ridiculous, poorly thought out, even downright stupid at times. But, he didn't voice these thoughts. He had learned quite early on that arguing with Tsuri was like arguing with a rigid, unyielding tree--chances are, it wouldn't listen to you, and, on bad days, it could even drop pine cones on your head.
So, as always, Rieux, albeit reluctantly, goes along with Tsuri's whims.
In retrospect--because hindsight is 20/20, as they say--he is irrevocably grateful to Tsuri for having such whims in the first place. (It was just yet another thing Tsuri did right without even knowing that she did.)
It is at the sixth (or was it seventh?) hat store that Rieux sees her, standing on the other side of the crosswalk, unobtrusive, innocuous, barely even looking his way.
But it is her. Rieux had no doubt.
So, when Tsuri accosts the shopkeeper, jabbering on about detectives and mustaches, Rieux leaves the store and crosses the street.
She smiles when she sees him coming her way, as calm and radiant as he remembered.
An infinite amount of words flood his mind, and, just as quickly, those words disappear, so that all he is left with is a whispered, barely audible, "Saber." Her name. It has been so long since he said it that the taste of it on his tongue stings--of unbridled happiness and of nostalgic sorrow.
"Rieux," she answers, her lips curved into a smile, her eyes reflecting mirth and happiness, love and understanding.
I missed you, he wants to say, but can't. Why did you leave? Where were you when I needed you? I needed you. I still need you. Come back. Come home. I loved--love--you.
He cannot say any of those things. It is too much, too soon, too quickly. But, Saber understands; she always does--did--after all. (It is yet another thing they do not have in common. Saber and Tsuri, that is.)
"Let's go to the park, Rieux," she says, with an undisguised joy that lights up her face with happiness.
This, he thinks, as he allows her to lead, this is a thing they have in common.
-
Saber sits on the swings, and Rieux stands beside her.
They do not speak.
In this moment, at this time, they do not need to speak.
The silence speaks for them, weaving truths and promises, for there is an understanding, deep and profound, between them.
It is a promise of eternity, and the understanding that this eternity shall never come to pass.
"I'm sorry," Rieux says, finally, breaking the magic, ending the moment. (But, then again, hadn't the moment been over a long time ago?)
Saber turns to look at him. Her eyes are curious, questioning. "For what?" she asks, as if she truly does not know.
For leaving you behind, for moving on--for everything, he thinks, but says, "For not being able to save you."
Her hand reaches out to touch his own. "It's not your fault for letting go, Rieux," she says, quietly, as if she could read the meaning behind his words, "There's nothing to forgive."
Rieux looks at her, really looks at her, and sees the girl she was, five years ago. He is older now, and she is still exactly the same.
He wants to cry.
But, instead, he moves his hands over to grasp hers, intertwining, and she smiles and closes her eyes, sighing contently as she leans on him for support.
They stay like that, in that warm cocoon of warmth and love, until Tsuri finally finds them.
-
In true Tsuri fashion, she bursts in with shouts and benedictions, rudely interrupting any form of peace and calm that might have been present.
Saber and Rieux quickly extricate their hands as Tsuri starts on her tirade.
"Rieux, I've been looking for you forever! At least tell me if you're going to run off on me! Anyway, can you believe it, the day's already almost over and I can't find a single suitable detective's hat! What kind of businesses are these people running anyway?! How can they expect me to work without a hat! Don't they know that true detectives--"
It is only at this point that Tsuri stops, realizing that Rieux is not the only one there. "Oh, hi," she says, unabashed, "I'm Tsuri."
"I'm Saber," the other replies, eyes full of laughter, "I'm an old friend of Rieux."
"Wow, really?" Tsuri exclaims, as if she couldn't believe it. "I didn't know he had such a beautiful female friend," with absolute sincerity.
And, Rieux briefly wonders how exactly it is that Tsuri is able to sound so charming in front of females but downright insulting in front of him.
With a speed that almost gives Rieux whiplash, Tsuri and Saber are laughing and giggling away as if they had been friends for centuries. In another moment, Tsuri excitedly extracts a promise to eat ice cream together and hurriedly, in typical Tsuri fashion, runs off to buy some, all without even considering Rieux for one iota of a second.
"She's nice," Saber says, her wide smile the product of the whirlwind that had just passed through, "I like her."
"Good," he mutters, and, sardonically, "She'll probably marry you if you asked her."
She turns to look at him again, her smile lessening but never disappearing altogether. "She's good for you. You look happy."
"Don't," he says, pleads, because the words are beginning to sound like a farewell.
"You know I have to go, Rieux. You know I can't stay."
He shakes his head.
She stands up and puts her hands on his. "You've grown up," she whispers, looking at his face, "I'm happy for you."
Don't leave me, he wants to say but doesn't.
She smiles her usual smile, because she had heard it, regardless. "I won't. I'm not. I'll always be here if you need me."
Rieux wants to protest, wants to cry and scream and demand that she stay. But, he doesn't. It's the least he can do now, not making things difficult for Saber, for himself.
Instead, he simply states, "I won't forget you."
And, with a beautiful, painful laugh, she says, "Well, I'll see you later then, okay, Rieux?" and with a final squeeze of the hand, she is gone.
-
Bearing ice cream, Tsuri comes back thoroughly confused.
"Where's Saber?" she demands, as if Rieux had somehow magicked the other girl away somewhere.
"Dead," Rieux answers, curt.
Tsuri stops, midway through her ice cream, and shouts an exclamation.
Sighing, he clarifies, "I mean, she's been dead. For a long time now."
After a bit of a coughing fit in which Tsuri desperately tries to get the vanilla out of her nose, she regains enough composure to piece things together. "Then," a cough, "then that means the Saber that was here just now was a..."
"A ghost," Rieux finishes for her, seeing as she was otherwise incapacitated by periodic wheezes.
"Why-- why didn't you tell me?! Now what am I going to do with this ice cream?!" she yells, gesturing wildly with the cone of her first ice cream to the second ice cream she holds in the other hand.
Rieux raises an eyebrow. "Eat it?"
Tsuri calms down. "Oh. Good idea."
-
It isn't until Tsuri had finished off both ice cream cones and then washed her face of leftover vanilla that Rieux decided to do something he had been considering for a long time but had never done because it is, well, simply put, a stupid thing to do.
But, talking to Saber again had reminded him of those feelings, and all the times he had been overcome with regret because it was too little, too late.
So, for once, Rieux decides to be a little less sensible, a little more stupid.
They are on one of the piers overlooking the ocean. Rieux is leaning against the railings, looking out at the blue expanse of the sea, while Tsuri is completely draped over the metal bars, eyes downcast, sighing over the loss of yet another beautiful female from her list of friends.
It isn't a comfortable silence, per se, not like the one between him and Saber. It is more of a self-absorbed silence, with each too caught up in his or her own thoughts to even consider talking. But, regardless, it is familiar, and, perhaps, in that way, it is even comfortable, maybe.
"Hey," Rieux says, breaking the silence. He doesn't even wait for Tsuri to completely lift her head before, "I love you."
"Huh?"
"Don't misunderstand, Tsuri. I don't love you as a friend. I love you as more than a friend."
Tsuri is fully conscious now, staring at him, shock written all over her face, completely and utterly speechless. (It is, Rieux thinks, sardonically, the quietest he has ever seen her.)
Rieux takes this precise moment to kiss her.
It is chaste, more of a brushing of lips than a true kiss, but, Rieux decides, it is suitable enough to get his point across.
Afterwards, Tsuri makes a noise that would have sounded like "What" if fifty other words hadn't also been thrown into a mix.
Rieux tilts his head, more than a little amused but unwilling to show it on his face, and leans back against the railings.
Finally, after several minutes of decidedly awkward silence, Tsuri finally regains the use of her vocal cords. "I don't know what to say!" she exclaims, the words coming out ten times fast.
"You don't have to say anything," he replies, calmly, "I don't need an answer. I just wanted you to know."
"Oh," she says, "oh."
-
The next day, Tsuri arrives at Rieux's apartment at the usual time (which, as always, is much too damn early).
The awkwardness of the previous day had completely disappeared, whether from a restful night's sleep or a dozen cups of caffeine, Rieux does not know, but he finds himself once again grateful to Tsuri for never taking things too deeply to heart.
Everything will continue like always.
And Rieux is completely satisfied with that.
--
Aeterna
*Or: 5 times Tsuri was kissed by someone and 1 time she kissed someone else
1
Tsuri is in fourth grade and impossibly young.
She's best friends with Mei who is really sweet and cute and funny, and they have been friends for a year now (never mind that they met in the middle of third grade) and everything is new and wonderful and interesting.
Half the girls in the class have discovered this secret club that all the adults were in, something having to do with crushes and boyfriends and love. And they all want in too, so they stand around looking at themselves in mirrors (because that's what the adults do) and giggling to each other and pointing out a boy and designating said boy as cute or adorable. (Never handsome, not yet. The word is too incomprehensible, too adult.)
Tsuri really doesn't know what all the fuss is about. They're all just boys, aren't they? She has two younger brothers, and they're two three-year-old terrors, really, and she doubts six more years will change them much.
But, everyone else seems to be so invested in this new game they've found, and Tsuri hates to ruin their fun, especially because all the girls are looking so much happier and cuter for it. She likes seeing the other girls happy, and she doesn't understand why they would want to spend all their time looking at boys when girls are so much nicer and prettier.
But, but, Tsuri humors them and joins in their discussions of who is the cutest and do you think he likes me back. She even participates in their boy-watching activities, pointing out who she thinks is cute (the one on the right, but not as cute as the girl who sits on my left in english) and who she might have a crush on (the one with the brown hair and the freckles, but not as likable as the redhead with pigtails who always sits in the front).
She becomes so invested into these activities that one day she slips up and points out a boy in front of Mei. (And Mei detests these talks. She would always frown and turn away when other girls mentioned it.)
"Really?" Mei says, frowning, "You like him more than me?"
Tsuri blinks at the silliness of the question. "Of course not." How could she possibly like a boy more?
"Oh."
And then Mei is leaning in, and before Tsuri can fully understand what is happening, she feels a featherlight touch on her lips and realizes that Mei had kissed her.
"Oh," Tsuri echoes, "Oh."
-
2
It is the teen years, high school, and Tsuri is fifteen and still young, still impossible.
Mei is still Tsuri's best friend, and they are still the same, still as always.
The school dance is coming up, and Tsuri eagerly requests pictures from all the girls she knows. The guys in their suits, the girls in their dresses. She thinks it's all wonderful really, the amount of work everyone puts into it all to make themselves beautiful (even though, she thinks, privately, even though they're all so beautiful already).
On the night of the dance, Tsuri takes Mei to their secret spot, a hill overlooking the town, and they have their own private party.
They don't wear dresses or jewelry or makeup, and there is no music to accompany them. But, when Mei leans in and presses her mouth firmly against Tsuri's, Tsuri can think of nothing better than what they have, here and now.
They stay like that for several long moments, lips slightly parted, simply breathing into each other.
-
3
Tsuri has just turned sixteen, and she is not so young anymore, not quite.
Rieux is her new friend. He moved into town a few months ago, sad and alone and looking for all the world like he does not have a single friend in the world. So, Tsuri becomes his friend, because she's Tsuri and she's interested in this strange, new boy who looks like he has a gaping hole in his chest where his heart should be.
Mei is still her best friend, but Rieux is now too. Sort of.
And Mei is about to kill Rieux, and Tsuri is, for once in her life, completely at a loss.
"You're choosing him over me?" Mei asks when Tsuri stops her, tears in her eyes, looking betrayed.
No, Tsuri wants to say, no, this isn't so simple as choosing someone over another. Instead, she simply takes away the knife in Mei's hands.
Mei is crying and unstable and Tsuri has no idea what to do. When Mei leaps at her, she drops the knife and almost (but not quite) raises her arms in order to defend herself, but all Mei does is wrap her arms around Tsuri and desperately (so, so desperately) kisses her.
It is a sloppy kiss, tainted by tears and betrayal and an acute fear, and all Tsuri could do in the face of that is to push her gently away.
Then Rieux says, level-headed and practical as ever, "We need to call the police."
Always so pragmatic, Rieux.
-
4
Tsuri is seventeen, and she has decided to become a detective. Together with her trusty partner Rieux, they'll be the next amazing crime-fighting duo that no one can ever stop!
(Rieux keeps on saying that she's getting Sherlock Holmes confused with James Bond, but Tsuri begs to differ. She knows they're different, she just thinks it would be much, much cooler if they were one person.)
And, now that they have officially solved their first case, Tsuri has completely proven Rieux wrong (the downer, always saying that something will go wrong; well nothing went wrong!), and she is anxious to return and gloat right in the other's face.
But then the owner of the stolen jewelry wanted to thank her personally, and Tsuri can't deny a pretty girl anything, so she goes to her estate and knocks on her door and smiles when she's admitted, fully expecting the detour to last only a few minutes.
Well, it isn't the first time Tsuri's been wrong.
The instant Marie sees Tsuri, the former blurts out, Thank you very much, and I really like you, and If possible, could we maybe, possibly go and get coffee sometime, please.
It takes a few moments for Tsuri to decipher the babbling. It takes a few more moments after that for Tsuri to realize that she has just been asked out. By a client--their first client, no less.
(Tsuri sincerely hopes that this type of thing won't become a habit.)
So then Tsuri proceeds to spend the next hour and a half comforting the girl and trying to say, It's not you, it's me, when it actually is her and not Tsuri, and in the end, Tsuri feels so awful about the whole thing that she agrees to a kiss in order to pacify Marie.
The kiss is quick and shy and over in less than a minute, and Marie is so embarrassed about the whole thing that she practically pushes Tsuri out the door.
If she had known this is what would happen, Tsuri would've suggested the kiss from the start.
-
5
Tsuri is eighteen and Rieux has just kissed her on the pier.
Rieux has just kissed her on the pier.
Tsuri frantically tries to rewind the day's events, trying to find something, anything, that has hinted at this inevitability.
No, absolutely nothing.
Of course, Tsuri silently scoffs to herself, of course I can't expect Rieux to be predictable.
There are a number of things Tsuri can say at this point, from What in the almighty name of James Bond and all things Sherlock are you doing? to I can't believe you kissed me right after we just saw the spirit of your dead girlfriend! there really is an endless amount of possibilities. (Inanely, her brain supplies an image of a mustache with the caption: I mustache you a question, but she pushes the thought away. Jokes later, explanations now.)
Finally, Tsuri manages a garbled out response that mostly consists of the word, "What," but is about twenty times too long to be just that one word.
Rieux sighs and then proceeds to explain. Yes, I am completely serious. No, you don't have to say anything. Just listen, Tsuri.
And: I've been in love with you for the past few years.
Tsuri feels like she's about to faint.
-
5 + 1
Tsuri is ageless. She has seen nine, sixteen, twenty, and bypassed them all.
She's standing on the edge of the world with Rieux (always with Rieux), and looking down at the wide expanse of the earth, so far and so beautiful.
"Where do you think we should go from here?" Tsuri asks, and the question comes out as a mere breath, light and soft.
Rieux sighs and turns away. "Wherever. Does it really matter, as long as we're together?"
Tsuri wonders, briefly, how Rieux is able to say all this without seeming embarrassed in the least. It's an idea that has been often considered, however, so Tsuri quickly pushes it away. "So we're staying together?"
Rieux turns back and shoots Tsuri an incredulous look. "Of course we are." The why would you ever think otherwise? goes unspoken, but Tsuri understands--she's had a lifetime to get used to Rieux's particular brand of non-verbal communication, after all.
"Oh," Tsuri says, regardless, and, laughing, "I'm glad."
With a small sigh, Rieux makes to move away, but Tsuri stops him with a hand on his arm.
Rieux raises an eyebrow and tilts his head--the What? is obvious, though unspoken.
"Nothing," she replies, smiling, and then she leans in to kiss him.
It is not a great kiss, as kisses go. Rieux is so surprised that he starts and their teeth clash almost painfully together and, even after adjusting, their lips never quite meet perfectly and neither seems to know whether to keep their mouths open or not.
But, when Tsuri pulls back, flushed and embarrassed, and sees the first signs of color on Rieux's own face, she finds that this moment is perfect, just as it is.